omg lessons

first off, no one gets something for nothing. whether it's cold hard cash, an emotional investment, or putting yourself out there over and over again, it takes energy and effort to get what you want. things just don't 'land in your lap' or 'appear at your door' without some kind of action (or series of actions) on your part. secondly, many people understand that the various social aspects of kink (munches, play parties, conferences, dungeons, and the like) can be difficult to navigate, break into, and actually excel at. there is real social anxiety, social awkwardness, social fear...and i'm not trying to minimize that in any way. however, if you want to hide behind those fears, that awkwardness, that anxiety - that's your prerogative. it is a choice to do nothing. and you lose the right, imho, to complain how the fact that you do nothing, results in nothing. (and yes, posting an ad/profile on fetlife is basically doing nothing). if you don't get any...